Friday, April 27, 2012

Own worst enemy...

I feel disgusting today.
 I went out last night to the Worlds Largest Office Party. I had a great time with my friends. I had enough to drink where I was feeling good and I was relaxed. Unfortunately when I "relax" I let all my cares go and am not very careful about what I eat. I always use those as a "small victory" if I can make it home and in bed before I mow down on food. I didn't make it last night.

My down fall was not having dinner before going out. I tried to eat healthy snacks mid afternoon so I wouldn't be tempted by the unhealthy food I was surrounded with. I made it til about 10:00 before I had to eat something. I grabbed a burger at one of the stands and only had ketchup on it. I was happy with my decision.

Bad decision: Stopping at a fast food place on the way home. I bought tacos from Taco Bell and went home and stuffed my face. I am my own worst enemy on my journey. I know it is a small slip up, but it is so discouraging. When I think I am on a good run and have finally learned, I do something like this.

There was not tears this time. (Yes I did cry when I had my first serving of french fries after starting my journey) I have said this many times but, it is a very emotional journey. I hate having slip ups like this but I do what I have learned... Accept it and move on. There is no "starting over on Monday". I made the mistake, I don't want to dig myself a deeper hole.

*Sigh* Still a good distance from my ultimate goal... it will just take me a little longer.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Drivers license...

A funny thought came to me at the gym. I finally weigh less than what my drivers license says! You are probably wondering "why does this matter". It is a symbol to me. When I was 16 I dreaded putting that "number" on my divers license. I was so paranoid about others knowing my weight, I stressed over this.

When I re-newed my license I finally accepted that I needed to put myself over 200 lbs. but I stuck with a lower number. (wishful thinking) I am now lower than the weight on the little plastic card... I love it!

Looking back: I used to make myself almost sick worrying about what the Dr. or school nurse would say about my weight. I hated being weighed. I didn't want to know how out of control I was. Now I can't be more willing (maybe a little obsessed) to know and share my number. It is a measurement of how far i have come and how much I have grown.

Side note: Still stuck at my 92 lbs. I am so close to the 100 lb. loss that I am getting frustrated earlier than normal. All I can do is keep my head up.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

On a budget...

Throughout this whole experience I have read probably hundreds of articles on weight loss and other views on the subject. One that was interesting was an article on buying healthier foods on a budget. It was an interesting article and can be found on Yahoo Shine.

After reading the article (most of the points were things I had read previously) I went down to the comments. I read comment after comment of how eating healthier is expensive and can't be done. I know organic foods are a little more expensive and the "diet foods" can be too. What about just real food?

When I started making different choices, I was broke. I had a $30 a week budget for groceries and that was breakfast lunch and dinner. I kept to that budget and found it surprisingly easy. When I was buying frozen pizza, chips... I would eat the entire package or most of it in one sitting. I find that those sorts of foods are just as expensive if not more. I had no portion control and would not make several meals out of it. A bag of chips can be up to $4 a bag... bag of carrots? $2.

Do the research and you can find that eating healthier isn't all that expensive. Compare prices, nutritional facts and servings. You might be pleasantly surprised.

 It can be done if one wants to do it.

Monday, April 16, 2012

Still the emotional eater...

I got some bad news yesterday that rocked my world.

After getting the phone call from my mom, I instantly went into "getting prepared" mode. One of the things I needed to do was get groceries. Easy task you would think right? Not for an emotional eater.

I was upset and trying to get my mind to stop running. I was at the store and saw the frozen pizza section. All I could think is; That will make me feel better. I knew ultimately it would make me feel worse, but you see, I was an extreme emotional eater before. Happy, sad, mad, hell any emotion at all I could think of to justify eating fast food or a bag of chips, I used it.

I walked by the section with frozen pizza. I walked by the chocolate section... 3 times. I even wandered down the chip aile... I left the store with... my  normal groceries. I didn't give in to that emotional urge to gorge myself until my emotions were settled. I got the groceries I needed (okay I added the skinny cow ice cream sandwhichs) and got the hell out of there.

I think not giving in to the temtations and the urges actually made me feel better. It is one of the "small victories" I always talk about. I made it thru that moment in my life. I know there will be hundreds of other "moments" but hey, celebrate the small victories when they come.

Monday weigh in: 221

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Post from the Past

While working out tonight, I ran into one of the "regulars" at the gym. Chatting with him got me thinking of the first time he spoke with me at the gym. I posted about it in my previous blog but thought I would post it on here to share.

While I was at the gym tonight a man came up tome after my workout. He told me what an awesome job I am doing with my fitness and continued to tell me it was great to see how hard I was working.
We started chatting and I brought up the fact that I used to have an anxiety towards the gym. I had been made fun of at the gym years ago and it was a horrible experience. After I told him about my anxiety he shook his head and said… “If that ever happens, you tell me. Show me who the person is and I will take care of it.”
I thanked him for the compliments and the support and went on my way. Once I got to me car, I was overwhelmed with emotions. I think of the person I was when I first tried to go to the gym. How embarrassed and hurt I was to have people make fun of me for trying to change my life. That time in my life I wasn’t ready to make my life change because I let that stop me. I actually didn’t start going to the gym until the end of last summer. I wanted to lose 50 lbs. before I started going. That feeling hadn’t completely left me…then. Now I am confident when I walk into the gym. I say hi to the people I know and don’t shy away from doing a work out because people are in the gym.
Looking back at the person I was and the person I am today, the difference is shocking. I still have a ways to go, but with the endless support that I have from friends, family and strangers… I will make it.

After reading this post again, it makes me smile. I have made it so far and have a great support system. I still have a ways to go but as I said; I will make it.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Different opinions...

I was having a conversation with a friend the other day. She found an article that had Myths and Facts about weight loss. One of the "Myths" was that when you skip a meal your metabolism slows down.

Now under the "myth" it stated that if you skip one meal it will not slow your metabolism. When I continued reading, the article then stated that a study proved that it would take "weeks" of skipping meals or an extremely low calorie diets to slow down your metabolism.

After reading the article my thought was... duh. If you just do it once or twice it won't do anything. However, if go on an extremely low calorie diet it WILL slow you metabolism. I am not understand what the article was calling a "myth" when they clearly stated it was a fact. Maybe the line of "...skip a meal..." compared to "...going weeks..." was the difference between fact and myth?

The reason why she showed it to me was that I always say not to skip meals because it messes with your metabolism and makes it harder to lose weight. When I was in highschool and in my early years of college, I skipped meals all the time. I thought it was the thing to do to lose weight. I went years with out eating breakfast and months without eating lunch along with it. The only thing it did was make me super hungry and binge eat the next time I had a meal. It wasn't a healthy way to live. I swear that starting to eat breakfast was an important part of my life change.

Any thoughts on this?

Monday, April 9, 2012

Shocking Monday results

I did my normal weigh in today. I waited until I got back to La Crosse from my parents house. The Easter weekend was busy but fantastic. I had a great time with my family.

There was so much food going on this weekend. Most of it was normal meals and even healthier choices. Sunday was the big Easter Feast! I had a lot to eat, not to the point of feeling over stuffed, but enough. I was a little worried about today's weigh in with all the goodies I eat.

Official weigh in: 223
Total weight loss: 90 lbs!!!!!!

I finally broke through that plateau! I didn't do a whole lot of exercising this weekend, but we were busy getting the house ready. I am so happy and excited for this day. 10 more lbs. and I will reach a 100 lb. loss.

Here is to a new week!

Funny side story: My parents live in the country so their dogs are never on a leash unless they go to the vet or get a hair cut. I tried taking the youngest dog out for a wog with me. Zoey didn't quite understand: 1. why she was on a leash and 2. how to jog. I walked first and she was alright, but when I started jogging she was looking around and sniffing everything! haha it was an experience to say the least. :)

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Fun Conversation:

Me: I want to be in shape enough that when I am walking with a tall person, I won't be huffing and puffing to keep up with them. I want to walk fast!

My Friend: Yeah someone will ask you "Why are you walking so fast?" and you can say "This is a fast world and I am tiny".

Back History: I am only 5'1" and it is hard sometimes to keep up with people who are tall and walk fast!

Monday, April 2, 2012

Monday weigh in

One of the habits I picked up through my journey was to have a weigh in day. When I started the Biggest Loser contest at work, Monday was when we weighed in. The contest ended August 2010, but I kept with the habit of having an official weigh in day.

Whatever I weigh on Monday is what my weight is through out the week. I still weigh myself everyday, but it would be a huge emotional roller coaster (or a bigger one anyways) if I went day by day.

I have also kept up the spreadsheet that I started during the contest. It has my weekly weight from the past year or so. It is interesting to see the ups and downs that I have had. It even calculates how far I have to go to reach my goal as well. (Yes I can be extremely organized at times)

Unfortunately this mornings weigh in was not what I expected. I have hit the dreaded plateau. My weight loss had been consistent the past weeks, so I knew it was bound to happen. It is frustrating to hit these spots and not know what to do to get past it. A tip that I read was to change up your routine. If you are doing the same thing day in and day out your body gets used to it. So make a small change; try a new class or change up the equipment that you use for your work out. Even a change in your meals could help kick start the weight loss again.

Looks like I will be changing my routine once again.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Small Victory: Wogging

A few weeks ago I started "wogging". Wogging is what I call my walking/jogging attempt. I can't really call it jogging for the fact that I don't run 100% of the time. However, I do still want credit for the jogging effort I put towards my outing... so I wog.

Last year at the end of summer I tried jogging. I was still above 250 lbs. so it was a hard trial. Once I wasn't able to go to the track anymore, I stopped. I am now down to 226 and am hoping that starting to run will help increase my endurance and weight loss. Right now I am just walking for a minute and jogging for a minute in a half. (I started at 2 min. and 1 min.)

I can tell there is a difference every week that I go out. Today I ran 2 1/2 blocks without stopping (yeah I know that doesn't seem much). When I started I was lucky to jog one block.

That is my small victory for the day. I am going just a little bit farther than I did the last time I went out.

Here is to a new week!