Sunday, September 30, 2012

Falling down.

I have been doing this weight loss thing for awhile now... well over a year. I have had the worst week, since starting out, making food choices. It is like I have no control... again. Don't get me wrong, it is for sure not as bad as I used to be. However, the decisions I made this week are stalling my weight loss progress. Between the potluck on Friday and Oktoberfest yesterday... boredom eating today. I feel like I am out of control. I gained at least 3 lbs. (as of right now) and just feel like crap about it.

There are no tears over it (as of right now) but I am very frustrated with myself. I know better. I don't cut anything out of my diet, but I still don't need to have these "treats" so often. I need to get back on track on Monday and clean up the damage I did this past weekend.

Thinking on it, I must have gotten too "comfortable" again. "Oh I know what I am doing." No. It is a life long thing that I am going to have to stay on guard with.

Where is my inspiration and motivation this week...

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Still in a daze...

I am still on a high from last Saturday. Yes, I finally did my first 5k! It was a huge relief and overwhelming moment. I still can't believe I finished that thing!

On to the next round... I am going to keep up my running, until there is snow on the ground. Not a huge fan the cold and all that. I need to get back to the gym and hitting the weights. I love doing different things throughout the week. It keeps me interested and my body guessing. I had been so focused on the running, but need to remember to have a balance of fitness. ALSO! As a gift for my huge day on Saturday, my aunt and uncle gave me... wait for it... the INSANITY workout! oohhh boy, here we go! I am really excited to try it to see what I can do. I am really getting into this fitness thing and having fun with it.

I am still a few lbs. from being under 200 lbs. (2 to be exact!) It feels a little strange getting that close to such a huge goal. I can't explain the feelings I have had the past few weeks. It is exciting, but scary too. I honestly do not even remember being this size in my life (yeah that is how long I have been over weight!). I am not really sure why it is a tad overwhelming. Maybe for the fact that I am doing things I have never done before? Being in so many new situations and having this new confidence? It is all new to me, I never realized that I would be so overwhelmed by losing weight. I am ready to see how far I can go, but a little nervous too of what is to come.

Saturday, September 15, 2012

First 5k complete....

I have been sitting here today, after my friends all left, thinking about what this day really means to me. Completing my first  5k run is something that I NEVER thought I would be doing.

I was so nervous this morning, stomachache and all. I have ran this distance before, but nothing like what I tackled today. My aunt, uncle and sister came up to run and walk the race. I was so moved by them being here to support me and so proud of my sister for walking her first 5k! My friend Kayla was the first person to say she would run it with me no hesitation at all. My friend Nate ran the whole thing at my side and kept me going when I felt like I "needed" to walk, when really I just needed to keep going.
My friends Justin, Cindy, their little ones, Jamie, Erin and Beth all came out to cheer me on for my first 5k. All of them knew how big this was to me and came out to support me. I was so happy to see them at the finish line!
The support that I got from the people who ran, walked, came and msged me is the most wonderful thing in the world. I am truly blessed for having such awesome people in my life.

Of course I picked the toughest 5k races to do in our area. HILLS! lots and lots of hills. I didn't realize it when I signed up, but the more I heard about the "hills" the more nervous I got. I trained yes, but the only "hill" I ran over was the viaduct! I was not prepared for the hills that I conquered today, but I did it. My mom always told me I could never do anything the easy way.

I kept saying this today and I need to repeat it again... 2 years ago there is NO WAY i could have or even would have thought I would be running a 5k. I have come so far it is really overwhelming to think about the person I once was. I still have my personality (a great one at that!) and values, but I am such a different person than I was back then. I am more happy and living life. Having new experience and realizing who I really am. I also absolutely love to go clothes shopping now!

I think this new experience has just shown me that I can do whatever I put my  mind to. I am so not finished yet and cannot wait to see how far I can really go. Stay tuned for my next adventure!

Today is the BIG day...

Holy wow am I a nervous wreck. It is one thing to go running on my own and something completely different when you are attending a race. I am so scared I won't be able to finish, I will get sick... I will trip! I don't know. Not feeling the most confident this morning.

So many people are participating and cheering me on today. I still get teary eyed thinking about it. I am really about to do this today!

(Longer post later!)

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Today is your day....

I have been listening to this song and thought I would post my favorite lines. It is by Shania Twain and I absolutely love it as a motivating song. Today is your day to begin...

"Today is your day, everything is going your way."

"Today is you day, and nothing can stand your way."

"Brush yourself off, no regrets."

 "This is as good as it gets. "

"Don't expect more, only less."

"Just go out and give it your best."

So I ask you this... Is today your day? :)

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Still running... 1 week to go!

The morning running just didn't get me. It was way too early to be up and about, but was nice to be done for the day. I gave it a try and will do it again if I don't have the time after work. Since the weather was cooler tonight, I ran after work!

A good friend of mine told me that to prepare for a a race you should run longer than the race is going to be. He mentioned doing 4 miles or more... yikes! Not so much tonight, but longer than the 3.1 the race will be. I will call it good for now!

I was getting bored with only going to the gym once a week and doing running the rest. I need to find a happy medium. Still train, but still get my variety. Tuesday I did my dvd and Wednesday I got my fitness on at the gym. I loved it and even lost weight! Which is exciting bc the past few weeks has been losing and then gaining... frustrating as we all know.

The people at the gym I go to are AMAZING. It was 1 year ago that I started going to the gym for the first time in years. I had previously been made fun of and laughed at at another gym. I was so insecure and afraid the same thing would happen. However, the people I have met have been so supportive. They had nothing but encouragement for me and still do. Between the advice, tips and honest to goodness support, it is a great place to go after work. They have been cheering me on for this race and I hope I won't let them down!

Stay positive and keep on keeping on!

Stories from the gym:
 I also went to the gym last night with mismatched socks! That is how I roll I guess... unintentionally. ALSO! I have seen someone else lip syncing and dancing on the treadmill...yes! I am not the only one. If you can't have fun at the gym... where can you have fun?!

Monday, September 3, 2012

If you can't do it for the rest of your life...

you shouldn't be doing it now. That is my motto when making decisions that concern weight loss and my healthy lifestyle. I do not know how many times I have explained that. (I never get sick of it) I hope people understand that the changes I make, I plan on making into habits. Habits that will keep me healthy for a very long time.

I was recently asked "Are you allowed to eat that on your diet?" ouch! I know by talking about and being open about my healthier lifestyle, I invite major judgement in what I eat and drink when I am with others. I am not on a "diet" I am trying to live a healthier lifestyle. I am able to have whatever I like, it is my choice. When I choose to have something unhealthy... it is my problem. If I choose to have something heatlhier... that is my right. It has nothing to do with anyone else. So if that happens to you... try your best to brush it off. You know what you are doing. It is all about small changes (aka SMALL VICTORIES) and making choices. People are going to make comments, but in all honesty... the only opinion that matters? is your own. If you make poor decisions about food or workouts... accept it and move on. I know that is easier said than done. I have had MORE than a few freak outs and I am sure they will never truly go away.

New Photos...

I had a "progress" photo shoot with my good friend and photographer Sam. She is one of the most talented people I know and I had a blast taking the photos! (I changed my previous photo to one from Saturday.) I cannot believe how much I have changed from the person I was 2 years ago to the person who is in those photos. I see the confidence in that person's eyes... the confidence that wasn't quite there 2 years ago. I can't wait for everyone to see the rest of them and I can't wait to have my final pictures taken!

Check out her fb page!!/SamanthaMaide

Fun Moment:

This past weekend I attended my family picnic. When I heard my uncle say "I didn't even know who that was...", I felt amazing. I am 50 lbs. lighter than I was last year at this time, which means I look a tish different. I am not sure if it sounds conceited or not, but I love getting that reaction!
It was a weekend filled with tasty food and not so healthy dishes, but again, it is about portion control.


Training for the race has been going pretty good. Last week I got up at 5:30 a.m. and 4:30 a.m. to run when it wasn't so hot. I am getting better with running more, but still have a way to go. It is supposed to rain this week so I am not sure how many times I will get out, but there is always the gym! I am getting more nervous as the day draws closer. My friend who motivated me to run a 5k this year e-mailed me the other day. He ran his first 5k 2 years ago... the other day he ran 20 miles... MILES! I am so proud of him and he is a major inspiration. He helps make me believe that I will actually be able to do this.

All I need to do is keep my head up...